Be Still
This has been a long season of a rollercoaster of emotions, experiences, and movements in my life. Over the last 13 months I have experienced some of the deepest joys and the deepest hurts of my life. I have seen relationships get suddenly intersected and stunted. I have seen the cost of poor decisions ripple through my life and the life of dozens of people I love. I have experienced confusion and loneliness in the midst of a long season of transition. I have been wounded personally and at times have not been ok. I have seen my wife and my kids struggle through the loss of friendships and community. And the phrase that God kept telling me was “Be Still.” Most of the time I didn’t want to be still, I wanted to move, I wanted to comment, I wanted to respond, but God kept whispering, “Be Still.” So slowly I chose to agree with Him, I chose to stop writing, stop engaging the hurt voices, to stop debating. I chose to, “Be Still.”
I dived into the verse in the Bible that is most known for the words, “Be Still” Psalm 46:10. I asked God to show me what He wanted to show me and He started with the definition: to cast down; to let fall; to let hang down; then, to be relaxed, slackened, especially the hands: It is also employed in the sense of not making an effort; not putting forth exertion.
God showed me that I could, “Be Still,” to let down, to let fall the things in my mind, in my heart, that were consuming my time, my thoughts, my energy. He didn’t promise anything in return, He just showed me the offer of being still. So recently, I have been stepping into the practice of being still. It isn’t easy, the pain of lost relationships, the struggle of my kids finding solid footing, the financial strain, is a constant competition to being still. I am not proficient in being still, but I am making progress in that direction.
And Jesus continues to amaze me with His personal plan for my life and the life of my family. Four months ago we loaded up the contents of our house onto a truck and drove across the country to Arizona where He had prepared a demographic of people for me to show His love and His power to if I wanted to. It has been a whirlwind of new community, apartment life, home buying, new schools, hope of new relationships, and unbelievable potential of Kingdom impact. I have seen a demographic of people begin to stir in the hope that their life matters and that they can be a part of something bigger than themselves. I have seen my kids rise up in the Truth of who they are in Christ and be confident. I have seen God do miraculous things in and through people.
I need to continue to practice the exercise of, “Be Still.” When I let go, when I stop making the effort, when I don’t put forth exertion, I experience the reality of God in and around my life. The realities of the past 13 months still exist in my life, but I am more prepared than ever to know God and live boldly, aggressively and effectively in His plans. I’m looking forward to what is next as I live in the discipline of, “Be Still.”