I remember one Saturday morning in a season where it was the first day in at least a month that I was off.
My phone started ringing at 7:30 am and after a quick internal argument, I didn’t answer it and turned the phone off.
The next day my boss pulled me aside before church and said, “I need you to be available 24/7 for anything I need. From now on you need to have your phone on at all times and I expect you to answer or get back to me in 15 minutes.”
My heart sank. I felt used. I felt devalued. I realized that I would never thrive in that environment.
I also have said more times than I would like to admit–why don’t they get it? Why can’t the leaders just do what I am asking them to do? Why can’t the students just go along with my idea?–Reflecting over the last 25 years, there are times I have pushed volunteers and students to do it my way without ever listening to what they might be bringing to the table. I get frustrated, they get hurt, and eventually they leave.
I think many people in ministry begin with a heart to lead people to connect with Jesus and be the best person that they can be, but over time, with the pressure of a growing ministry, the need to get things done within a deadline, or the pure weariness of a long season, people can begin to choose the easy button of controlling someone (or the ministry) because it is easier to get things done in the immediate. I have seen young successful leaders, including myself, get blindsided by a supervisor or volunteer team who sits them down and lets them know that they are feeling controlled and devalued. Usually that happens as the ministry is starting to decline in numbers or effectiveness.
I have learned over and over again that ministries need to be led not controlled. Ministries need a leader that will clarify vision, define goals, collaborate together to define strategies, and then unleash people to accomplish the agreed upon strategies, goals, and vision.
I believe healthy ministries are made up of people who have a desire to influence and impact people for Jesus.
I believe these people have incredible gifts and talents that when empowered to be used, can accomplish the vision of the ministry in powerful ways.
I believe people want to be a part of something bigger than themselves and want to know that what they do matters in the bigger objective.
I also believe out of insecurity, fear, and sometimes exhaustion, leaders find themselves being intimidated to the point where they begin to control and limit the people serving in their ministry.
Leading ministry requires more time, sacrifice, energy, emotional investment that controlling ministry, but it also can result in an explosion of evangelism and spiritual growth as dozens of people begin living out who they have been created to be.
How, do you start leading instead of controlling?
First, lead with vision, communicate vision, recommunicate vision, and communicate vision again. You know you have communicated vision enough when the volunteers, students, and parents start communicating the vision back to you.
Once you have vision integrated into the ministry, then you have to give ministry decisions away to others. Leadership is about helping other people discover who God has created them to be and then helping them live their lives in that new reality.
Once you have given ministry away, if there is something that doesn’t go the way you would like, you can check yourself by looking at the vision. If the vision is being accomplished, then you need to let it go and celebrate the people you have given the ministry to. If what is frustrating doesn’t go with the vision, then you get the opportunity to have a clarifying conversation with the people you have given the ministry to. Even though is may be difficult, if you have the right people in place they will understand that clarifying conversations are an essential part of healthy leadership growth.
When you lead with clear vision, goals, and strategies, it is easy to lead people versus control them. When a group of people come together under a common vision, the ministry is set up to be freeing and advancing. When goals and strategies are clear, people feel confident that they are doing the right thing and they are more likely to feel like what they are doing is important.
How you decide to navigate leading ministry will determine how controlled people that you serve with will feel. If you are humble and willing to receive feedback, you can be successful in leading a healthy ministry.