The first youth group that I led was on a Sunday night. I hadn’t slept for a couple of days because I was so excited. I got to the church 3 hours early to make sure everything was set perfectly. This was going to be amazing. At 10 minutes after group was supposed to start two girls showed up. We spent the next hour talking getting to know each other, and I left a little disappointed that we only had 2 (shout out to Debbie and Jenni) students. Over the next 2 years I spent hundreds of hours at schools, sports games, band concerts, and theater productions investing into students and their families. When I left that church two years later, the youth ministry had grown to around 60 students that were connected through common investment in each other. The ministry provided a place where everyone could be themselves while they figured out how God intersected their lives.
At my current church, we reached 870 unique students this past year. We have numerous resources in a huge building, youth paid staff, a storage room with more random youth ministry items that you can dream of, a youth band, and a budget that gives us the ability to do some great things. Over the last 3 years we have seen some incredible spiritual growth as students have come to Christ, entered into discipleship relationships, have stepped into serving, and have built a volunteers team of 60+ committed volunteers who invest in students weekly.
What I have learned in 25 years, and in both of these experiences, is that ministry can never be about me. When I had 2 people in my youth group it could not be about me, because if it had I would have been insecure, accusatory or angry. When I had the privilege to lead 100s of students, if I made it about me, I can get prideful, entitled, and think that I am the reason for growth. The fight to constantly remember that ministry is not about me is one of the most important learnings that I have learned. I have learned that the success of ministry is dependent on how I invest, care, and sacrifice for others.
I believe people leading in ministry constantly have to battle the draw to take personal responsibility for the success of ministry and to blame others for the shortcomings and mistakes. I realize that the opposite mindset is actually more effective. If I take responsibility for the shortcomings and the mistakes of the ministry I lead and give credit and affirmation to others for the successes, I find that more volunteers and students are drawn to it and they begin to walk in the reality of who they were made to be. And the great part of consciously not making the ministry about me is that I have found incredible freedom – freedom to be myself, freedom to not be focused on numbers, freedom to not worry about my religion, freedom to not feel guilty when we have one of those dumpster fire type of nights. I have learned if I fight to make the ministry lead not about me, everyone wins and most importantly the ONE who deserves the credit gets the glory.